Bodacious Boomer

What every mom secretly wants

In Unforgettable gifts #1, I included gifts that could be given to friends and family alike. I know that for some of you, finding the “perfect” gift is truly important. So when I came across these, I just couldn’t keep them to myself. This time the gifts are just for those of us with XX chromosomes. You know how every Christmas retailers come out with those cute mother-daughter outfits, the matching skirts or sleepshirts? Well, these mother-daughter gifts would be appreciated by perhaps the more “progressive” or “free-thinking” mom. Or perhaps a mom who just wants to train her sweet daughter to go into her chosen profession.

So here you go for mom- the Peekaboo Pole Dancing Kit. This is the only portable pole dancing kit that installs in 60 seconds or less! “Put on some music, shake your booty and earn a fortune in Peekaboo Cash”. “Comes with Peekaboo garter and $100 in Peekaboo cash”. According to the website, “there’s a Peekaboo Lap Dancer in all of us and the Peekaboo kit aims to help you find it from setting the scene with peek-a-preparation, choosing a sexy peek-a-name to planning your latest routine. The kit comes with everything you need to lap-it-up”. Lucky for me I read this disclaimer- “Note: The Peekaboo Pole is not a professional dance pole, so not swing on the pole using your entire body weight”. (Of course for your featherweights who are size 2, it’d probably be fine).

I’m sure most little girls wanted to be like their mommy at one time or another while they were growing up. So here’s something for them so they won’t feel left out: The Pole Dancer doll. “When the music plays, she goes round and round and up and down”.  I am NOT a prude, in any way, shape or form. (Just ask our daughter ). Amanda’s often mortified by my lack of prudishness or lack of concern about social mores these days. However, even to me, this doll is too much. Doug just walked in, looked at the photo and read what the packaging said. All he said was, ‘That’s just wrong”. I think that pretty much sums it up. (Of course, he’s all in favor of the Peekaboo Pole for me). When I was growing up, if an item appeared to be cheaply made, my father would say  “It’s looks like it’s made of a Prince Albert Can”. Without seeing one in person of course, I’m guessing that the Peekaboo Pole might be a recycled Prince Albert Can. After reading the disclaimer to him, we decided that perhaps in the interest of my safety and to prevent our ceiling from crashing down we should consult the Army Corps of Engineers to have them make a sturdy pole for me and at the same time come and reinforce our attic and foundation. I know everyone will be relieved to know that there will never be a video of me on a pole on YouTube while I still draw a breath on this earth.

Imagine the look on Grandma’s face when she she’s her granddaughter open her Pole Dancer doll. That alone would be worth the cost of the doll. Happy shopping! Today’s trivia answer- Parcheesi.

For the little princess in the family who wants to be just like mommy.