Has anybody seen my libido? Embarrassing as it is to admit that I’ve lost it, I have. I seem to have misplaced it; or perhaps it ran away from home. Maybe it was kidnapped. I’m not sure what happened to it. All I know is we can’t find it. We always treated it well. Doug even lost 15 lbs recently. (That surely should’ve kept it interested). I can’t believe it just up and left; we’ve been together for so long. So that means either I left it someplace and can’t remember where or it was kidnapped. I’ll admit that I occasionally move something and later can’t remember where I left it. I’m only human after all- and menopausal, give me a break.
Usually with things so valuable I make a mental note, or even write a Post-it, something to help me so I can remember where I’ve placed something valuable. (Sadly, occasionally I seem to have written the note with invisible ink). I only have a couple of nice, AKA not costume, pieces of jewelery and that’s OK with me. A couple of years ago I thought it’d be a good thing to put the earrings somewhere “safe”. They were safe all right. So safe I didn’t know where they were for over a year.
Since I’m not exactly sure how I would’ve packaged my libido prior to moving it somewhere, flat out misplacing it also seems unlikely. That only leaves kidnapping. What I want to know is- who else would want it? They wouldn’t know how to use it anyway. They don’t have the owners manual. They couldn’t even get it started. Maybe it was stolen then discarded when they couldn’t figure out how to make it work. The thought of it just sitting in a landfill somewhere is just too sad to imagine.
Could it be ransom that they want? If it’s cold cash that they want then we’ve got a problem. Although Doug considers it priceless, since we still haven’t gotten the $6K from you know who, a large amount of cash would be almost impossible to come up with at this juncture. (Now, if they needed some renovations done on their house, maybe we could work something out).
Of course if Doug somehow discovered that someone was holding onto my libido for profit and depriving us of pleasure in the process, he wouldn’t be a happy camper; and although I’ve never seen Doug actually hurt anybody, he can look really scary. (The whole big guy from NJ thing you know).
As I was writing this I’ve had a few more ideas, although I admit they’re far fetched. Maybe it’s just fallen and can’t get up; but if that’s it, I don’t know when it fell. Maybe it’s hiding under an invisibility cloak like the one in Harry Potter. Maybe it’s just sleeping like Robert deNiro in Awakenings. If that’s it, would someone please tell me what magic pill I can take to wake it up. I even tried Zestra. I’ve read that it worked for some women. I’m happy for them. However, I felt sunburned, not sexy. It wasn’t a good thing- at least for me.
I’ve read from time to time about other women losing their libidos. Do you think it’s possible they’re all off together somewhere partying? Maybe we need a libido detective or perhaps someone who really understands them- kind of a libido whisperer to help find them. I’m open to any and all suggestions. Please send them along ASAP before Doug grinds his molars completely into dust.
As I was reading this I thought I had written it myself, of course with a different husband. I’ve been going through this this for 5 years now. My poor husband is very patient with me. It’s not that he’s not attractive to me. I just seem to have no sexual feelings anymore. It’s very upsetting.
Hi Sandy. I know just how you feel. It’s strange, for me at least, to just feel kinda numb. I have a hard time getting started. I know it’d be OK if we were on vacation. Unfortunately, I can’t just stay on vacation.
I can appreciate every comment. I also have “been there”. What really helped me is a product on my site called Vital Vulva Wild Yam Salve as a lubricant. I love that stuff. If it is ever painful, that is a great solution. Natural yet effective. When my husband and I plan a date, then I try to make it a big deal like doing my make-up differently, doing my hair and even dressing up in a little frilly, sexy outfit. That makes it more fun. (And it gives him something to look forward to.) You can pretend to be someone else if you want. Become a character.
Sometimes we have a picnic in bed with wine, cheese and good bread. Just by doing things differently makes a difference to me. And my husband loves that too, anything that is not routine.
Men and women are so different as we all know. For me, it is sometimes hard to “be in the moment” during this time. I can find myself thinking about what I need to do around the house or anything else like that. But if we can get rid of the potential interruptions that may occur and try to just “be” it is so worth it.
If none of this helps or you have tried these things, please email me and we will think of something else. Take care and have fun.
Sheri
Thanks for all the helpful suggestions Miss Sheri. I’ll give them a try and let you know how I fared.