Michele On February - 22 - 2011

After working all day yesterday I was wound up tighter than a Swiss watch as my dad used to say. So last night when I finally quit painting, I decided to sit and decompress by watching some TV. It didn’t work. I will explain why in a minute. But first some backstory…

Having been a face painter and done kids activities in Houston for 30+ years we’ve worked at a lot of private parties; a lot of high end parties. Once I went to West U, a very chi-chi part of Houston, for a party for a 6 yr.old. It was about 2 weeks before Christmas. When I arrived I was told I could leave my purse in the living room. I walked in and saw the biggest Christmas tree I’d ever seen in a house. It was over 20′ tall.

I like big Christmas trees. We had one that was over 12′ one year. I thought that was tall. But this things was ginormous.  All the presents were wrapped in hunter green wrapping paper with coordinating plaid bows; which coordinated with all the ornaments on the tree. I’d never seen anything like it, and wondered what type of anal retentive had to have everything so matchy-matchy at Christmas. Perhaps she was channeling Martha.

In addition to myself they had a pony and a Santa too for the kiddos. Overall, I thought that was a lot to spend for a 6 yr. old. But I was happy to take their $300. It certainly made our Christmas brighter.

We did a lot of bar and bat mitzvahs over the years. Some of them were quite an affair. But then those are coming of age parties, so spending large amounts of $ are not unusual. After we started working with a party planner each of her clients wanted their affair to be bigger and better than the one they’d just attended. Many times grandma and grandpa would be flown in from the old country or failing that, Florida.

We were at one doing wax hands, they also had a caricature artist, a Hummer to take photos in, an artist who was actually doing a painting of the party while it was going on, a DJ, fortune teller and face painter. They even had a climbing wall.

Not to mention of course they had catered food and drink to die for.

But at least when you turn 13 you’re old enough to remember the party when you’re older. Which is a good thing, because the price tag for that shindig was $60 K!

The parents who put this one one were actually some of my favorites. They weren’t all that way. Some were rude and dismissive treating us like we were illegal aliens who should’ve been grateful to get any employment and escape from our cardboard box homes for the few lucky hours we were in their presence.

So I thought I’d seen some real over the top kids parties; well that is considering I don’t live in LA anyway. But I saw something last night that blew me away. It was Outrageous Kids Parties on TLC. Make sure you click through the slideshow and watch the clip as well.

It was like looking a car wreck. You know you shouldn’t look, but you can’t help yourself.

Before it all got going they showed a discussion she had with her family about the party. A budget of $10K was mentioned. The husband who seemed like a pretty normal guy, thought that amount was high; as did their other 2 kids, both teenagers.

When mom and her little princess met with the party planner she said she was thinking of a budget of 15. The planner said “hundred”? And with a dismissive wave the 5 yr.old, said “No, thousand.”

The “you ignorant slut” wasn’t said to the woman but it was implied. You’ve just gotta love a condescending 5 yr. old.

The mom paid their 18 yr. old son and his friend $100 each to dress up in costumes and hand deliver and read aloud the party invitations which cost $3K ! Yes you read correctly, $3K!

When they were already much deeper into the preparations, her husband, sensing that his wife had gone buck wild, asked for a more accurate number on just what it was going to cost. She stalled.

After that things just got crazier and crazier. The venue alone was $20K! There were professional dancers, a $2300 cake, 300 costumes rented for the 150 party attendees, and two separate hair and makeup artists just to attend to the little princess on her big day. And of course she and her pint sized posse arrived at the event in a horse drawn carriage which was an exact replica of the one Cinderella tools around in at Disney World.

As the father was standing in the midst of all the excess at the venue on party day, he looked around and said “I’m gonna be broke”.

And just what is the price tag for all this happiness?

Can you really put a price on happiness?

Well the price for that 3 hours of happiness came in at $32,304.48. I could be off a few pennies on the pennies. I was shaking my head so hard when I heard that number that the last few numbers didn’t stick.

All I know is that her mom must be able to suck the chrome off a bumper hitch.

And when the $2300 cake came out and the life size bird on it was purple, not blue, the little diva actually threw a fit. I would have so pushed her spoiled little painted face and perfectly coiffed hair face right into that cake.

But then I’m well known to be a party pooper.

That mom deserves the heinous bitch on wheels that 6 yr.old old is going to become in a few years. I just feel sorry for the dad.

I feel better.I just had to say all that.

Now I have to go and paint some more props and start filling 5,000 bags with sand and gems for the rodeo. Yee-haw!

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33 Responses so far.

  1. Susan says:

    That is sickening. Iam goingto have look for that show when I’m feeling really masochistic. If I watch that right after Toddlers and Tiaras, I’m liable to drop dead, though.

    Why are people so stupid?
    Susan recently posted..Give Me Electricity or Give Me Death-Almost LiterallyMy Profile

  2. Crikey, if the parents don’t sort themselves out, she is going to develop into a spoilt child that everyone dislikes. $32,000 on a party? They are completely off their heads!
    Annie (Lady M) x recently posted..Everything I did this weekend begins with C- Chums- Cafe- and Comedy ClubMy Profile

  3. Michele says:

    I think she is already way past spoilt Miss Annie.

  4. Jewell says:

    You know, this is a constant sore spot for me…this and bitchy, whiney, ungrateful brides and pageant brats. So, knowing where this was going I started on a slow boil. …………Until I got to this part, “All I know is that her mom must be able to suck the chrome off a bumper hitch.” I think I peed a little. =) LOL I love you BB! =) You’re awesome!
    Jewell recently posted..Mugshot Monday 2-21-11My Profile

  5. Aleta Woods says:

    The little darling needs a board of education on her backside, Mom needs to see a shrink, and Dad needs to get a backbone. However, I really laughed at you statement about the Mom and the bumper hitch. People,people, people…I guess it takes all kinds in this world, but I think we can do without a few kinds like this “family.”

  6. Michele says:

    Just imagine what a charmer she’s going to be when she hits her teens. I’m so happy, happy, happy that she’s not my child.

  7. Donna says:

    All I have to say about anyone that would pay that kind of shit on a 6 year olds birthday party is, dumb asses. Good luck.
    Donna recently posted..Dear 22211My Profile

  8. Darla says:

    I loved the “bumper hitch” line too! But on second thought, the women that I have known that have bulldozed their men repeatedly are usually not sucking anything either. I don’t know why these men put up with that shit without getting something in return. Maybe they hope these women will do that for them someday, if they just do everything she wants first. Burns me up to see a demanding banshee and a husband that is a wuss.

    Life will be very hard on that little girl if she thinks that people will always bend to her will. Well, unless she grows up to find a wuss like daddy, who happens to be richer. But even then, she will wonder why she is so unhappy and will find herself (as a grown woman) lusting after some grouchy pool boy.

    It’s mommy and daddy’s fault. They are creating this little monster.

  9. Michele says:

    That’s exactly what I thought too Darla. I don’t see her behavior improving from this point.

  10. Carol W says:

    Whatever happened to a few kids coming round to teh house and a homemade cake…kids today want so much it seems? Materialistic little so and sos.I had a face painter (she was a friend) at one of my son’s parties (which we had at home with a home made cake!) It was the best party ever as they all ran around with faces like tigers or robots. They loved it. My son refused to wash for days. (Come to think of it that was a phase he also went through when he was a teenager.)
    Now I must find this past post of yours about eyebrows.
    Carol W recently posted..Always look on the bright side of lifeMy Profile

  11. Fred Miller says:

    I thank God I was raised broke. Maybe for a birthday present that kid should fly to Libya or Bahrain and just hang out with some other little kids her age and go through a revolution or something.

  12. Michele says:

    Our kids were raised working in the family biz so they know the value of a $$. We had BD parties for them, but nothing at all like what that spoiled little diva got.

  13. WOW! Unbelievable. I feel bad for the dad but not too bad. He must of known what he was getting himself into. I feel much worse for the daughter, because she doesn’t know she’s being taught all the wrong things.

    What is this world coming to?!!

    But it’s still a funny story.

  14. There are no words…I thought I went over the top with our little parties at McDonalds and the goodie bags I filled with matching cheap trinkets…sheesh…I’d be laughed off the block. or worse!
    Kim Wright (Pinkim) recently posted..Happy Pink Saturday!!My Profile

  15. Michele says:

    Yes Miss Kim, you’d have to walk around with a brown paper bag over your head; like all the other normal people would who don’t buy into her craziness.

  16. Melinda says:

    Ugg that’s just sick. I think of all the good that could have been done with that money. I can’t watch those shows. I agree a barf bag is required. Crazy!
    Melinda recently posted..Packing Tape and Cardboard DreamsMy Profile

    • Michele says:

      I’m always up for a party; but I just sat there amazed. That was pretty crazy for sure. It makes me wonder what mom’ll do for a her sweet (or in her case probably not so sweet)16 soiree.

  17. Jeanne Kraus says:

    The whole thing sounds disgusting. However your take on it was refreshing, and pretty darn funny. It gave me a great movie in the head. I would have liked to have been there to pass you some odd looks across the marble ballroom, and I do have a spare vomit bag that I took from my last trip. Unused. A souvenir of sorts.
    Jeanne Kraus recently posted..Presidential ProcrastinationMy Profile

    • Michele says:

      That show is on TLC every week. The promos show a pirate party next week. You just may want to keep that bag close at hand.

  18. Albug says:

    Unbelievable! What is going on? I don’t think my wedding cost 30K . We threw a party for our sons 10th birthday, the theme was The Summer Olympics. A dozen boys competed in about six events, medals were awarded and a trophy was given to the grand champion. Whole thing cost about 50 bucks. 25 years later, my son and his friends still talk about it, really, honest, they still do. Best time ever.

  19. debbie says:

    I don’t even feel sorry for the dad. Have a backbone! And there was a party for a 15 year old around here like that a few years ago where the daughter, who was turning 15, got a Mercedes convertible. This year the mother was arrested for embezzling.
    debbie recently posted..I Knew Exercise Was Bad For YouMy Profile

  20. Haley Lloyd says:

    It does make you wonder though. Materialistic little so and sos.I had a face painter (she was a friend) at one of my son’s parties (which we had at home with a home made cake!) It was the best party ever as they all ran around with faces like tigers or robots. I don’t even feel sorry for the dad. No Grandkids?
    Haley Lloyd recently posted..Acne TipsMy Profile

  21. Lindsay Kirk says:

    I thank God I was raised broke. The little darling needs a board of education on her backside, Mom needs to see a shrink, and Dad needs to get a backbone. Maybe they hope these women will do that for them someday, if they just do everything she wants first. That’s exactly what I thought too Darla.
    Lindsay Kirk recently posted..Swiffer MopsMy Profile

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