Michele On November - 25 - 2011

Yesterday was the biggest day in the year for foodies- at least in the US.

How big is it you ask?

Well according to a doctor I saw on TV, the average American consumes 4,500 calories on Thanksgiving day.

That is a butt load of calories for sure; however keep in mind that includes all the pre-dinner munchies, the dinner itself plus the desserts and the inevitable late night kitchen raid which comes 3-4 hours after waking up from the post dinner coma.

If it makes you feel any better please know that that number also includes all your beverages.

But before we all go running in with scissors in traffic please remember that after all, it is just one day- for most people anyway. And afterwards you can always just bump up your exercise to offset all those extra calories.

Of course in my case that means I’d have to jog from Houston to Galveston and back; but then I really like pie.

Some people feel like this later:

I’ve never felt like that. However, the post turkey day dinner stupors in our family are legendary. I’ve seen Doug crashed so deeply after Thanksgiving dinner that someone could’ve removed his kidney without him ever knowing til it was long gone and already into someone else.

Like most people, I always thought it was the tryptophan in the turkey that was responsible for turning people into zombies after dinner.

There was even a Seinfeld episode about it:


But I was wrong.

Here’s the straight poop, so to speak.

So all those years when the turkey has been fading the heat, in reality it’s those carbs we all love so much- the stuffing, the potatoes, the bread and the desserts that are  responsible.

Personally, I can live with that.

To me a short coma is totally worth a dinner that is just that good AKA bad for you, especially one that you don’t have every day.

Besides I just got my lab results back a couple of weeks ago. My triglycerides were only 65!  Deep down I think they got my labs probably got switched with those of a marathon runner; but I’m not getting them redone to check for sure.

Of course you don’t have to go that route- the route of excess that is. Some people are good at self-control.

Good for them.

That same doctor that I saw on TV discussing calories prepared a “healthy ” plate to show that it could be done.

It had:

1 slice of white meat turkey, no skin

a thick slice of roasted sweet potato, plain

a heap of steamed green beans

1/4 C. of stuffing

2 T. cranberry sauce

a slice of pie so thin that you could read a paper through it

The gravy was MIA.

Yeah, I know that is the healthy way to go.

And afterwards you wouldn’t succumb to a carby coma then be struck with massive guilt for having been a glutton. And I’m sure it would be fine; but would it be great?

I don’t think so.

In Texas, gravy is it’s own food group. The gravy fountain is a popular gift.

Having Thanksgiving dinner without gravy would be like having Christmas without a tree, or having sex without the happy ending.

Sure you could do it, but it just wouldn’t as good.

Everyone has one thing at Thanksgiving dinner that they are absolutely defenseless against- usually consuming mass quantities of it like the Coneheads.

It’s their Kryptonite.

And the funny thing is that for most of us, you could have this exact same thing any other of day of the year; it’s not hard to find like Yeti testicles. Still on turkey day, it’s the one thing that makes your day.

So for some people it’s candied yams, for some it’s stuffing, for some it’s desserts.

Some people eat Crescent rolls and butter like they’re going to the chair.

My Thanksgiving Kryptonite

So what’s your Kryptonite?




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27 Responses so far.

  1. Pearl says:

    Gravy. My krytonite is gravy.

    Now if you need me, I’ll be off in a corner, surreptitiously pouring gravy over a loaf of bread.


    Pearl recently posted..The Boy Has His DemandsMy Profile

    • Michele says:

      Hiya Pearl. Doug’s Kryptonite is gravy too. If we can find a coffin that is leak proof, he wants to go to the great beyond floating in a pool of it.

  2. Dazee says:

    my kyrptonite is the banana cream pie. oh yeah. and the mashed potato’s and gravy, and the yams slatered in butter and brown sugar, oh and about half a can of cranberry sauce. oh wait. sounds like the whole meal
    Dazee recently posted..Frack…..What Happened Here??My Profile

  3. Pam says:

    I had to cook this year. It took me 9 hours on Wednesday and Thursday morning but I did it. And everything was gluten free (including the dressing and gravy) and organic and any sweetener was either honey or Turbanado or Coconut sugar. My total calories for the day came in at 882! For the day! And no one got sleepy or grouchy and everyone said that everything tasted better this year! Yay! And thank goodness because, if I couldn’t have done it, I would have had consumed those 4500 calories. And loved every single one of them! LOL
    Pam recently posted..Color Changes or The Room Redecorating Project from HELLMy Profile

  4. DWei says:

    I would love a gravy fountain for Thanksgiving next year, who cares how unhealthy it is, it looks awesome.
    DWei recently posted..Early Christmas ShoppingMy Profile

    • Michele says:

      It does indeed. They’re in all the stores around here; but then we’re in TX where people have actually built shrines to gravy. You’d like it here young one.

  5. fishducky says:

    I’ve seen champagne fountains at weddings but I’d never seen a gravy fountain. I would like to nominate the inventor for sainthood!

    As you might have guessed, gravy is my Kryptonite–poured liberally over stuffing.

  6. Michele says:

    Gravy fountains are much more fun; and no one ever got a DUI from too much gravy. You may need an angioplasty at some point; but you won’t wind up in jail from overindulging.

  7. Patti Winker says:

    My kryptonite is the turkey – dark meat only. I must have the thighs and those little “oysters” found in the hip pockets, you know? Combine that with my Curried Cauliflower and I’m a happy Pilgrim!

    I just noticed the word kryptonite if broken down (loosely, mind you) could be “krypt” and “tonite” as in “sleep as if in a crypt tonight.” Ha! I was in bed by 7:30 last night and didn’t get up until 10 this morning. Yikes.

    and BTW Michele, I am Thankful for you!
    Patti Winker recently posted..Thanksgiving Memories – Comment For A Chance To Win A Huge Hillbilly Housewife CollectionMy Profile

    • Michele says:

      Awwwwwww… you make me blush young one. and I’m with you on the dark meat. Curried cauliflower? I’ve never heard of it. Is it roasted with curry sprinkled on it or super duper heavy curry?

      Curry is supposed to be really good for your body; so I;m trying to eat more of it; but I can’t take the hit you in face with a shovel curry.

  8. Janet NZ says:

    I vote for gravy too! … and crispy Turkey skin… I’m off to badger your friend Pam for the recipes for her gluten free recipes :-)
    Happy Thanksgiving Michele XO
    Janet NZ recently posted..ThanksGivingMy Profile

  9. AG says:

    Thanksgiving is not the day to be healthy, I declare! My kryptonite was mashed potatoes…my mom didn’t want to have them this year and have scalloped potatoes instead and I freaked out and said I WILL MAKE THEM but she didn’t want two types of potatoes but I said THAT’S ALL I WANT and we had both but I only ate the mashed potatoes and that’s my story. Love them!
    AG recently posted..Guest Blog by Melynda FleuryMy Profile

    • Michele says:

      Scalloped potatoes instead of mashed at Thanksgiving? What kind of madness is that? What’s next-rice instead of stuffing?

  10. Loved your post…as always.

    My kryptonite is my own stuffing made with sausage and chestnuts and all lubed up with gravy.

    “Susan Says…” recently posted..Make This Dip! I Insist!My Profile

    • Michele says:

      Lubed up? We are talking about food still aren’t we?

      Just thought I should ask.:0

      BTW- I made your dip. It was proclaimed best new food at our Thanksgiving to-do. Thanks for sharing the recipe Miss Susan.

  11. Well Yeti testicles are not my favorite anymore….. They are just getting too expensive! Personally I am all about the stuffing…. and the potatoes…. and the cranberry sauce…. and the pie…. Fine I cant choose!!! So Im a pig so what! Happy belated Turkey day!
    From the Mind of a Madman recently posted..Black Friday and ChristmasMy Profile

  12. Liz C. says:

    I guess my Kryptonite is the mashed potatoes & gravy. No. Wait. Maybe pumpkin pie & whipped cram. I ate massive amounts of each this year since I can’t really chew… You know. I needed to keep my caloric intake up, lol.

    I did once overdose on food but it wasn’t even Thanksgiving. We had gone to dinner w/ friends @ a new Mexican restaurant & I OD’d on Spinach enchiladas w/ cream sauce that was to die for. Later, I did feel like I was dying…
    Liz C. recently posted..Apparently, I Lack The The Whole Christmas Lights Understanding Gene…My Profile

  13. melynda says:

    As you know from my post at Ag’s it’s PIE. That’s right sweet succulent pie.
    I only buy it twice a year because I will eat a whole one by myself. sigh. I know. I’m a glutton.
    melynda recently posted..Little Boy and His DogMy Profile

  14. Aleta Woods says:

    Pumpkin pie!!!! End of discussion. Hee, hee.

  15. Jocelyn says:

    Mine is probably the mashed potatoes–the good news since joining my husband’s family is that their ‘tatoes are often not all that good, which saves me from myself. We–hallelujah–did a nontraditional Tgiving this year, with enchiladas, carrot salad, brussels sprouts, and Turkish yogurt soup. This holiday hater shouts, “May that happen every year!”

    Oh, and re: the 4,500 calories thing; I’m pretty sure if I eat as my stomach wants me to–if I were eating unchecked–I could consume 6,000 calories every single day.

    *dramatic sigh*

  16. Young Farmer says:

    My krytonite is gravy. and the potatoes….
    Young Farmer recently posted..Acne TipsMy Profile

  17. Amelia Pittman says:

    and the mashed potato’s and gravy, and the yams slatered in butter and brown sugar, oh and about half a can of cranberry sauce. 882!!!!! It took me 9 hours on Wednesday and Thursday morning but I did it. I must have the thighs and those little “oysters” found in the hip pockets, you know?
    Amelia Pittman recently posted..Many MopsMy Profile

  18. Zyrine Kirk says:

    Gravy is good for thanksgiving.
    Zyrine Kirk recently posted..Appetite Suppressants: A Must Way to Lose WeightMy Profile

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