Hang on tight today kiddos.
We’re gonna take a walk down Crazy Ln.
I’m gonna share some seriously twisted shit.
And twisted it is; there is no other word for it; and I don’t mean twisted in a fun way like I usually do. By compare to these people I really do look like the poster child for mental health; and we all know that takes some doing.
So if you’re not up for it, please come back next time. The funny will be back I promise.
In the meantime for those hardy folks among you:
I got the first story from my friend Cheryl’s blog, The Art of Being Conflicted.
Here are the Cliff Notes for you-
This first candidate for a straight jacket had his naughty bits removed (by a MD), then cooked them up and served them to people for $250.oo a plate.
Yes, you read that right.
He garnished each plate with parsley, which is a good thing because everyone knows you eat with your eyes first. Is it oddly humorous that he served them up with a button mushroom, or is that just me?
If you have the stomach for it you can read about it here; and yes, there are photos.
I wonder do you serve red or white? Just what would go well with testicles?- or for that matter placenta?
I remember reading years ago about a woman who kept her placenta, cooked it then it served it to her friends.
Think I’ll take a pass on that as well. I guess I’ve just not channeled Mother Earth enough to do that.
I’m guessing wine for the testicles and red for the placenta; but then I’m no oenophile.
I suppose if there’s an upside for that new self-made, life size Ken doll it’s that he’ll never need Viagra; but of course he’ll never write his name in the snow again either.
Now on to #2 in our showcase of “Can you really believe this shit?”
You can check out what the second guy did by watching this video.
Just who could do that to their pet?
I’ve read of people who have their beloved pet preserved after demise. I can’t understand that either; but at least the inanimate Fido or Princess is usually kept inside a house so as not to creep out others.
At least I think they are; and people grieve in different ways. But could you imagine how scary that would be to small child who saw a dead cat swooping around in the park?
The third story comes from sunny Miami and is the worst because there is an actual victim.
Most people are there for the sun and fun; but just like any big city Miami has crime; it’s just part of life. However this next thing is one of the worst things I’ve ever read.
And the fact that the victim was ALIVE while this was going on just makes it infinitely worse. Maybe the assailant had seen the Silence of the Lambs just one too many times.
And NO, I am not making light of this. It’s just the only way I can even begin to handle what was done.
Apparently the perpetrator started by taking all his clothes off.
Personally I probably wouldn’t have even called he cops at that point. I’ve seen naked in public before; but if I saw a naked guy actually beating someone and dragging them under a bridge, I sure woulda done something at that point. I may be short, round and old; but I could still swing a lug wrench up aside a nutjob’s head if need be.
Besides, it wasn’t like he had a concealed weapon after all.
So I have a question- Are people really getting crazier? Or am I just becoming overly sensitive in my sunset years?
But enough of this depravity.
Now go find yourself a kitten or puppy to hold for awhile and revel in your sanity.
Back to the funny next time.