Bodacious Boomer

Well, it’s May 11th. May 9th was really busy for me, what with Mother’s Day and working. Then yesterday I got a call from Amanda. “Mom, remember when you offered to do some cooking for us? Well, we could really use it right now. We’ve been eating nothing but fast food for a month.”

Amanda and Nate are both in college and this week is finals. I think they’ve been living off Taco Bell and Little Caesar’s pizzas. They have a great little kitchen in a house not too far from us. However, when finals approach Amanda gets kinda panicked and just doesn’t cook; all she does is either study or work on projects. She doesn’t know how to give 100% at school. With her it’s 150% or nothing.  She did a 21 page book report in 5th grade.

She gets that “over the topness” from her father. That’s why she makes straight AAA’s. That’s why he has over 300 ties.

I told her that I’d be happy to help and I was. But I had to plan what to make, then get to the store, then get it to them, doing all this while trying to coordinate with Doug, since at this moment I don’t have a car. On top of that, I was asked if I could help looking up some info so she could review business management. No problem again. It was 90 questions. I started it last night and finished it this morning. It was mind-numbingly boring, but I persevered.

I was feeling pret-ty good about myself and all I’d accomplished until I got a call about 10am. It was Brett.”Hi, what’s up?” I told him everything that’d going on and that I was tired but almost done with the third thing I was cooking for them. “What’s up with you?” “Not much. Hey, what’s the date?” “May 11th.” As soon as I’d said it I had a sinking feeling.

“Oh no, I’m am so sorry,” I said. Yesterday was our only son’s birthday and I forgot. Bad mom, very bad mom. Luckily Brett really doesn’t want “stuff” anymore; at least nothing that I can go to a store and get him; he just wants cash to improve his DJ equipment. So I just transferred money from my account to his in attempt to ease my guilt. It helped- but not very much.

He was actually laughing and said he understood, that he’d spoken to Amanda yesterday (when she’d called to wish him Happy Birthday) and knew I was helping her out. He got 75 birthday wishes on Facebook, so he wasn’t forgotten by everyone else, just the woman who’d given birth to him. I felt like pond scum. I called Evelyn to explain what I’d done and as bad as I felt, I think what she did one year on Nate’s birthday topped my forgetfulness.

She said she and Nate had just gotten in the car when she said “Nathan, your 7th birthday is just the best birthday ever! It was my favorite!” Then, as she backed up they felt a bump. It wasn’t a toy. It was his cat. (Sometimes some birthdays are more memorable than others). Almost 20 years later they can kind of laugh about it now. Then of course, not. But after hearing her story  at least I don’t feel quite so bad.

Has anyone else ever forgotten their kiddos birthday?

Fifty-eight years ago at this exact moment I was getting squeezed- big time. I was about an hour away from being born. Unlike some people, I don’t remember being born. For the most part, I don’t really remember much before the age of five. Over the years I’ve seen lots of photos of myself when I was just a tot. But I can’t honestly say that I have a lot of memories attached to them- sitting with Santa when I was 2, etc.

My first memory is of me sitting on the porch on my trike and my mom screaming at me not to move. I’m guessing I was 3-4. There was a snake near me. Lela Mae, our once-a-week maid, came out and killed it with a hoe. Isn’t it strange that that memory has stuck in my mind for 58 years now? You’d think I’d have a happy memory instead. I do have happy memories. My young life was not all scary encounters with reptiles.

I remember being rocked by Shess, my grandmother. She wasn’t a big woman, but she had big boobs; and I found out later she never wore a bra- at least not when she was at home. All I remember was that she felt really soft when she would rock me. That may actually pre-date my encounter with Rodney the reptile, I don’t know for sure. A lot of my fondest memories are connected to my grandparents. They didn’t have much- financially, but they had everything I ever needed. Isn’t it funny, I never realized just how little they had when I was growing up? I only wish they hadn’t live 700 miles from me.

I’m so glad my mom was here to be a big part of our kids lives. I think that’s so important. Today, I become the age my mom was when my dad died. (My dad died young-59). That’s a terrifying thought. It’s a cold, gray day here right now. Perhaps I’ll just stay inside make a fire and work on a couple of  Christmas presents. Does everybody get so reflective on their birthday?

BTW- I’m working on the next installment of Unforgettable gifts. Here’s a link to the others, if you need to look back- Unforgettable gifts 1, unforgettable gifts 2, unforgettable gifts 3.